Quiz question: What topic is currently trending on both TikTok and AARP (American Association of Retired Persons)? The concept of Lucky Girl Syndrome! According to TikTok, videos with the hashtag #luckygirlsyndrome have had more than 403 million views since February 2023!
The concept of Lucky Girl Syndrome is credited to a 22-year-old TikTok influencer, Laura Galebe. One day when she woke up, she started saying aloud, “I’m so lucky. Great things always happen to me unexpectedly.” After saying those affirmations every day, she soon noticed that good things started “flying at my face”. (See my blog: What Are Affirmations, Affirming Questions And Goals?)
What is Lucky Girl Syndrome (LGS)?
LGS is a jazzy title, something that will appeal to a younger generation. The trend of Lucky Girl Syndrome emerged on TikTok in early 2023. However, the theory is not all that new. The concept involves if you think positive, your positive thoughts will bring about positive results. Specifically, if you believe you’re lucky, good things will come your way. The good “thing” doesn’t even have to be something important. It can be fairly insignificant. For example, if I believe I will find a great parking space, any open parking space I find within 50 feet of the store feels lucky and reinforces my Lucky Girl Syndrome!
Lucky Girl Syndrome is Not a New or Unique Idea
The term Lucky Girl Syndrome can be attributed to a TikTok influencer in 2023, but the philosophy of thinking positive thoughts will lead to a more enriched and successful life has been around for decades.
Norman Vincent Peale (1898-1993), a clergy person and an author, was very well known for his philosophy of the powerful aspect of positive thinking. He is known for some famous quotes, for example, “Expect great things and great things will come.”
A confirmation bias is a thought process that confirms what you already believe. If you believe random good things will happen, you will look to all the little things that happen during the day that confirm your bias. For example, if you find a parking space close to where you work, you will attribute the parking space to your positive attitude.
A self-fulfilling prophesy is a prediction. It occurs when you set expectations and then only notice things around you that support your expectation. A perfect example is the placebo effect. If you expect a certain medication will be effective for your ailment, then it has a greater likelihood of being effective.
Affirmations are statements focused on retraining your brain to think more positively. Reciting “I am powerful”, “I can do this”, “Nothing will defeat me” can encourage positive self-talk, vs. negative self-talk. Recite these statements enough times and you just might believe them.
Does LGS Enhance Self-Esteem or Create Toxic Positivity?
Toxic positivity occurs when there is an excessive use of being happy and optimistic. Pretending bad things don’t exist doesn’t make them go away.
The philosophy behind LGS is intended to be empowerment and elevated self-esteem. Or, is Lucky Girl Syndrome really just a toxic defense mechanism that protects you from facing and overcoming difficult or unpleasant emotions such as anger, disappointment, frustration and/or betrayal?
Reiterating an affirmation, for example, “I am strong” can be very powerful! You may be able to retrain your brain and be in control of your own destiny. But what happens when you keep reciting that affirmation and you don’t feel strong? That is when you feel like a fraud, or an imposter.
Relationships Relearned: Learn. Unlearn. Relearn
To be in a healthy, successful relationship, what you learned in childhood about relationships may need to be unlearned and relearned in a different way as an adult.
Lucky Girl Syndrome can be relationship enhancing. If you feel good about yourself, you will be a better partner. Since you tend to be optimistic most of the time, you will seek out a positive resolution in unpleasant situations.
On the other hand, Lucky Girl Syndrome can create a toxic positivity in relationships. This can lead to an avoidance of discussions that may be about a difficult topic.
Relationships can suffer if there isn’t a mechanism for discussing the tough topics.
Learning how to interact in relationships is learned early in life. Observation of problem-solving skills and/or optimism/avoidance in childhood is something you can take into adulthood. While you have learned these skills in childhood, so has your significant other. Finding common ground will lead to more success in adult relationships.
Summary
Lucky Girl Syndrome can be an example of too much of a good thing, or it can be a self-esteem booster. Being optimistic and realistic at the same time is a terrific method for personal and relationship success.
With warmest regards,
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